… I find it difficult to trust people, particularly men, and still struggle massively around sex. I still dissociate, and feel like I split off from myself. I still define myself by these experiences and it tears me apart when programmes like ‘Diary of a call girl’ etc are on tv. It devalues my whole experience, makes me feel less able to speak about the reality. It makes me feel hopeless and utterly and wretchedly alone, drowned out by the vast noise of the sex industry and its all-powerful lobbying.